Prison smarts

  Depravity leads to increased creativity and ingenuity. When humans are left with no entertainment, they’ll make their own, when humans are left with no way to materialize their art, they’ll figure out some sort of way to get it out. Humans are undeterred in that way.  With limited supplies, mankind will create wonders that otherwise would be impossible.

      Recently, I have followed the TikTok of a group of inmates in a prison. They don’t disclose their names or which prison they reside at, however the setting of all their videos are the same. White chipping walls, fragile metal bed frames, and stained beyond repair porcelain bowls. These men, as women aren’t allowed in this prison I suppose, teach the outside world their amazing ways. All while keeping light hearted and surprisingly family friendly, if you ever decide to sit down as a family and watch prison inmates create engineering wonders.

        One of the wonders they created was the classic prison tattoo. A wad of toilet paper is twisted as tight as possible, soaking in hand sanitizer, and  lit on fire. Then you place a Pringles can on top of it with both ends removed and place a cardboard piece on top so the smoke had a harder time escaping. Let it burn till the fire is out. Then, carefully, scrape the soot off of the inside of the pringles can into a small dish. Mix in water till it’s a paste and then add a tiny tiny tiny amount of hand sanitizer. There you have it. Prison tattoo ink. What’s weird is that the tattoo ink will last decades. It’s amazing. Just heat up a needle over a lighter, and dip it in and then go to town.

      Another prison creation is apple shots. Apple slices  are coated in sugar, left in a plastic bag for a month or two, then eaten or soaked in  warm water. The apples ferment in that bag and a weak form of alcohol is created. The prison men showed off the nasty mushy slices and seemed extremely proud. I can only assume that it works. I won’t be trying it anytime soon but just the fact that they are amateaur brewers is amazing to me. Now they can be eaten like weird spongy apple slices or placed in a cup of hot water, allowed to soak till it’s cool, and then drank. Seemed disgusting but It’s my knowledge that alcohol is not usually served in most cement pens. 

     Another wholesome invention of these striped convicts are instruments. How…cute. I would never in my whole life imagine that criminals would engineer instruments out of shovel handle shafts or make spoons into a sort of xylophone. They take one of those hollow metal pipes that are connected to shovels, rakes, etc, and drill holes into them and seal one end. It’s a sort of clarinet-oboe-thing. It sounds like humming into a pipe but the fact that key change is possible is cool. Also, spoons! They drill bent spoons on a metal pole at varying lengths and then tap them with another spoon. This one is significantly better. It has a tinny and tinkling sound. Sort of like an old 80s song sound effect. It’s amazing. It’s incredible hard to imagine that our worst citizens (as many view them although none of their reasons for being in the pen is released) are making instrument for their own entertainment. It soften their edges and makes them seem far more human than any news outlet has ever portrayed them.

       Also, they prison men like to film their wardens and officers walking around. Some are kinder than others apparently. Their captions could range from “this handsome fella is the dude” to “this man got Randy boy in the box”. I don’t know what the box is but I hope he’s out now.

     In short, these prison men are doing no harm. They show off their engineering feats and continue to serve their sentences. If their creation only comes from what they are allowed then it is completely fine in my eyes. As long as it’s purpose is not to harm others or one’s self.