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The Holidays

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The holiday season, and Christmas especially, is a time to be spent with the people that you love, huddled in the warmth of your home. Counting down to December 25, and counting on snow that you know, in your heart, will not come, you sit and wait. You wait for your next dinner plate, and, slowly, you watch the number climb up the scale in your bathroom. (My personal record was met on the most recent Thanksgiving day, during which I ate a meal with my boyfriend and his family, and then dragged him back to a meal with my family and myself. I gained eight pounds).


To accompany the uncomfortable wiggling and unbuttoning of the pants that fit before you sat at the dinner table is the wonderful intrusion of your home- once a lovely warm place, but now a steamy room packed with body heat (and odor).


Opening the front door in response to a very determined knocking, you’re greeted with an ear-splitting “Hi! It’s been so long! How have you been??” and the coats shuffle past, and it seems that they’ve tied themselves to a wall of cold air, as they drag it in behind them, grunting as the elderly often do.


But, perhaps the worst of all is the greed and expectation. By no means am I exempt from this disease. American culture is notorious for waste. There is always a newer, cleaner version of what you have, or even something entirely new that still renders the products in current use useless. So you do as Americans do: buy the shiny new toy, place the old toy on a shelf for sentimental value, or because you want to refrain from your wasteful nature, and after a good week or month or year or two of neglect, the old toy is thrown in the trash and shipped to a wasteland that has grown exponentially in the time that it took you to read this paragraph.


Am I bitter and anti-social? Yes I am. I don’t believe in the meaningless pleasantries of small talk- especially not when I’m busy chewing my turkey. Did I just preach to you about waste management in an environmental standpoint? Look at that. I guess I have.

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The Holidays